Mum was born into a very loving family in London. Her sister Joan was her constant companion and together , they had an extremely happy and special childhood. She met dad at the dancing at which she excelled . Being a very clever dressmaker she was the smartest at the dancehall and with glorious brunette hair and a dazzling smile she was quite a catch. Dad, made sure he caught her as soon as he saw her. They made a stunning couple, and throughout their lives, people would stop and watch them dance. Everyone knows that Dads devotion to mum was exceptional . They were soul mates, and business partners. She was the Wind Beneath his Wings. They had their family, Jim and Elaine, who they adored and they built up a successful business together in the ‘1960’s creating the biggest driving school in Essex. Dad was the Go Getter, the ambitious East end boy, determined to make good and give his family all he could. Mum was his rock., his administrator, and like her mother before her, a great money manager. Mum was a steady reliable combination, of hard work and common sense. I met her 40 years ago this November - By the time Jim and I married in 1975, we were great friends. Our relationship had started with friendship and mutual respect, and it became love. My mum May, became her best friend too. She was a great listener, and a wise counsellor. She taught Elaine and Steve, Jim and I many, many things, which have stood us in good stead all our lives. 2 Everyone has times when they are cross with colleagues or friends. Often family would come round for a cup of tea, and to let off steam about someone. Her way was always a peaceful way to resolve your problems- find a way forward by being nice not aggressive or nasty. Her mantra was YOU’ll GET MORE FLIES WITH HONEY THAN WITH VINEGAR She lived her life that way. Never one to argue or find fault with people. For every negative observation of someone, given to her, she would come back with two positives about them. She was always kind, she would find time to listen, even when rushed off her feet. She was a great business mentor, and showed us by her example. When Jim and I, and Elaine and Steve, were married with young children, and running our respective businesses, mum encouraged us to find a good balance with work and life.… - she advised us to get help at home with the housework, - (not a typical view in the 70’s ) , - - and for us to go out every week together as a couple , mum and dad would babysit. We were all very lucky to be able to have time for ourselves , as well as being parents to three young children. Again she was wise, she knew this was important. Jimmy, Paul and Lindsey, together with Richard and Stephen, ( and later Robert) were devoted grandchildren, always spending time with her. Enjoying her company and playing at her house. She was a loving and generous nan. This was a very special time for us all. Our family was happy and we spent a great deal of time together. Aunt Joan, Uncle John and their family, Janet, John and Julie were regular visitors at the house too . 3 Elaine had Robert in 1990 and he was the darling of the six grandchildren . Loved and spoilt by us all he was especially close to mum as he grew up. He would go back to mum after school each day and stay until Elaine and Steve returned home from work. As he got older he actually began to care for mum as her forgetfulness was becoming more apparent year on year. Sadly as we all know by 2004 her illness was becoming unmanageable at home. Dads incredible and undeniably heroic efforts at caring for her a could not be continued as mums condition deterioated. After much soul searching by us all, she was transferred to a care home. The years that followed took away from us the lady we knew and her personality was masked by this wicked disease of Dementia, which robbed her of her incredible memory . Although seriously debilitated, mum was still mum. She still recognised us all and her face would light up with her beautiful smile, when we went into the room to visit her. She would enjoy hearing the stories of what we were all doing. Jim and I especially enjoyed quiet time with her, just holding her hand, showing her old photographs and talking about the good times . She loved Elaine and Steve, and hearing stories about all the family comings and goings. Dad of course was the mainstay of mums care. He was constantly at the home taking her treats and trying to make some sort of life for them both. Ten years is a long time to do this and no one could have cared for her better or with more love and devotion. Even with this dreadful illness they managed to celebrate their Diamond wedding. They enjoyed over 60 years of marriage. What a fantastic achievement. She saw every one of her grandchildren many times in her last few days. It was marvellous to see how she knew them , and could communicate her love for them. Each had a special bond and had time with her, to cherish. Her delight at the birth of three great granddaughters last year was evident. Emily, her first, was born in January and Isobel and Georgina six weeks later. Ten days before she died, we brought Emily from Leeds on a train to visit. When mum saw her, she said, HASN’T SHE GROWN., She knew her . She knew her grandson Jim and she loved them so very much.. It was a lovely visit. One to treasure in our memories for ever. 4 Each of the girls will be very blessed children if they inherit the wonderful characteristics and personality of that very special Great Grandmother who was Nanny Vi . There is a flower star from each of them today .,I am sure mum will be a constant star in the heavens watching over them. ……………………………………………………………………………………………. The staff at Gifford House care home, were wonderful and gave mum the very best care and supported dad too. We cannot thank them enough and know that they will miss mum very much, and dad too. In mums final hours they helped us give mum the dignified and peaceful death she deserved. We were with her to the end. ……………………………………………………………………………………………… Everyone who knew her, respected her. Everyone who belonged to her loved and adored her. We said that Mum excelled at dancing, in truth, she excelled in everything she did. As a wife, mother, a nan and a great nan. She is an impossible act to follow. Our world has changed and will never be the same ………………………………………………………………………………………………. AN ELEGANT AND VERY SPECIAL LADY